1. Steal things,

   Sell them,

   Don’t get caught,

   Rake in Profits

2. Get kids hooked on Cigarettes,

   Sell to them throughout their life,

   Rake in Profits

   - Tobacco Company

3. Create Cult,

   Get Believers to kill themselves,

   Collect insurance & wallets,

   Rake in Profits

4. Overcharge for Construction Project,

   Use sub-par labor & parts,

   Rake in Profits

5. Bootleg popular program,

   Sell to friends,

   Rake in Profits

6. Take money out of Paychecks,

   Put into “Federal Programs”,

   Rake in Profits

   - The Government

7. Sell Electricity,

   Cause line congestion,

   Blame on bad Infrastructure,

   Rake in Profits

   -Enron

8. Become Dictator,

   Seize food at border,

   Sell overpriced food,

   Rake in Profits

9. Make crappy movie,

   Payoff Film Critics,

   People go because they “Heard it was Good”,

   Rake in Profits

10. Get people to pay you to take garbage,

    Dump in Ocean,

    Rake in Profits

11. Add widely available flavoring to popular beverage,

    Market as new improved product,

    Rake in Profits

12. Get people to pay for new car parts,

    Don’t install anything,

    Rake in Profits

13. Make people pay for insurance,

    Make them pay more to use it,

    Make them pay more to keep it,

    Rake in Profits

    - HMO

14. Make people pay not to be beaten up,

    Make sure no one can beat you up,

    Rake in Profits

    - Vinny “The Snake”

15. Move to Mexico,

    Open a Chinese Restaurant,

    Rake in Profits

16. Steal things from thrift store dumpsters,

    Have a garage sale,

    Rake in Profits

17. Move to Greenland,

    Make a bunch of Igloos,

    Call it an “Ice Resort”,

    Rake in Profits

18. Do simple things on a computer,

    Amaze old people,

    Rake in Profits

19. Add addictive substances to a kid’s product,

    Sell to them throughout their lives,

    Rake in Profits

20. Take old tires,

    Make tire swings,

    Rake in Profits

21. Take out large insurance policy,

    Piss off local gang,

    Rake in Profits

22. Fill bottles with tap water,

    Call it something French,

    Rake in Profits

23. Pay off Politician,

    Steal taxpayer’s Money,

    Rake in Profits

24. Sell motorists radar jammers,

    Sell police radar detectors,

    Sell motorists better radar jammers,

    Sell police better radar detectors,

    Rake in Profits

25. Stalk a Senator,

    Take blackmail photos,

    Rake in Profits

26. Buy Dry-Erase Markers,

    Buy Plastic Bags,

    Market as new Drug,

    Rake in Profits

27. Make Crappy Band,

    Pay off MTV,

    They tell kids to like you,

    Record sales skyrocket,

    Rake in Profits

28. Sneak into Fat Camp,

    Sell Junk Food,

    Rake in Profits

29. Buy waste food products,

    Grind it all up,

    Add flavor,

    Sell as “Premium Choice” Dog Food,

    Rake in Profits

30. Get list of clients at Weight Loss Company,

    Go to their Houses,

    Sell Candy,

    Rake in Profits

31. Convince people to buy “low level ozone machine” really just an electric motor with a fan,

    Rake in Profits

32. Dilute Heroin,

    Legally market as Codeine,

    Sell to Pharmacies,

    Rake in Profits

33. Threaten world leaders with a doomsday virus,

    Demand Ransom,

    Shoot the secret agent in the head,

    Rake in Profits

    P.S. Release Virus Anyway

34. Sell High Quality Product,

    Build Following,

    Lower Quality,

    Rake in Profits

35. Sponsor health study of competing restraunt,

    Release data publicly,

    Rake in Profits

    - Bob’s Burger Palace

36. Get underpants,

    ?,

    Rake in Profits

    - Underpants Gnomes

37. Buy Retail Store,

    Give Employees only 10% discount,

    Rake in Profits

38. Pay 7 cents for a cup of popcorn,

    Charge $7 for a bag,

    Rake in Profits

    - Movie Theatre

39. Make poor selling product,

    Hire someone “cool” to endorse it,

    Rake in Profits

40. Get massive Surplus of diamonds,

    Convince people they’re valuable,

    Rake in Profits

    - Debeers

The Technology Perspective would like to warn you that many of our business ideas should not be tried. They are either illegal or morally wrong. The intention of these ideas is for strictly humorous purposes. We do not mean to offend anyone with any of our ideas. Do not read them if you are going to complain about them.

Filed under: Business, Humor, Interest